I Feel so Pretty... Oh-so Pretty~

The song What Make You Beautiful by One Direction embodies a societal ideal which I find grossly disturbing. I know the singers probably don’t exactly 100% mean it when they say that it’s the fact that this anonymous girl (that I’m sure a bunch of you wish you were) doesn’t know she’s beautiful (and I’ll go as far as to say that this girl has serious self-esteem issues, which is okay and normal, too) is the main reason they like her (and probably also the fact that she is beautiful despite what she thinks). And that’s okay to be into that sort of thing. To each their own and all that shit.

Let’s get this straight: I could give a fuck what songs are about (mostly they’re about fucking these days, which is nice, too) and this song doesn’t particularly bother me.

Ay! Sexy layday~

But what gets to me is, the fact that girls who know they’re beautiful? They’re bitches. They’re conceited and vain and all this shit. And I admit it, I used to think this too (in middle school).
But seriously people? In this society, it is ideal for a beautiful woman to be meek and humble about her appearance. And I get it. Humble is awesome (annoying sometimes, but awesome). But to the point of being shy and awkward and unhappy because one thinks something that is untrue is true? There's something wrong with that being what society wants from our young and beautiful girls and women. When one is truly beautiful, is it really a shock or a bad thing if she knows she is?

I’ve offended a couple of people (including my own sister!) by jokingly declaring things like “You wish you were as hot as this” or singing that song that I had thought went “I am so pretty/ Oh so pretty ♪” And all this is jokingly and during a time when I thought I was beyond ugly. Yes, it offends people. Maybe because I am kind of pretty (or maybe because I’m not?) (As you can see, I still have self-esteem issues).

I know I’m not beautiful. I know I’m not going to win a beauty contest or wet t-shirt contest anytime soon. But I know that I’m not ugly. I know that there are many guys out there that would find me attractive (and many that would not), and that there are (a few) girls out there that are jealous of my looks. And I know, I know. That sounds (without the parentheticals) super conceited. I read it now and I’m like, who is this bitch?
 
But logically. I’d have to be an unobservant idiot or just someone with low(er) self-esteem (than I have now) to not know that I’m not ugly.

And let me tell you, being in a constant state of self-consciousness is a fucking annoying state to be in. It’s not a bad thing (morally) but it is a bitch to not feel good about yourself.

So. It’s okay. To Feel. To Know. To Think. That You are Beautiful.

Divorce Ain't So Bad

It's common knowledge that divorce rates are increasing all over the world. And most people are alarmed by this. I usually just brush it off. Sometimes, I even rejoice a little.

Divorce isn't a bad thing, in my opinion. But that may just be because I've always harbored a desire for my own parents to divorce. Divorce is a way to get out of a bad thing. It's a way for one to be happier in one's life. It's the breaking of a union between two people, like... endothermic chemical reactions (I have chemistry regents on the brain. My bad.)! Energy must be put into this process and then, the bond breaks. Look, there is nothing wrong with endothermic reactions, and there is nothing wrong with divorce.

I rejoice in the fact that marriages aren't 100% permanent. If divorce ever becomes illegal, I'm never marrying. That's not to say that I want a divorce. If I get married, it'll be to a person and for a life that I know I'll never want to leave. But it's nice to know that if things get rough, I have an escape plan. And I know, that sounds lazy, and kind of wrong. But what I'm talking about by when things get rough isn't if we get into an argument. It isn't if we're short on money and struggling. It's if he becomes an abuser. Or breaks my trust to a point of no return. Or if we both simply fall out of love with no hope of ever falling back.

The divorce rate is higher, not only because people are marrying for the wrong reasons or because they are intoxicated by lust rather than love, but also because now that it's more widely acceptable and accessible, people who hadn't gotten divorces because of religious beliefs or societal restrictions, money problems or etc, are getting it. People who were abused see a way to get out. People who no longer love each other, who have been betrayed and can't see getting their trust back. People who want out.

They deserve happiness. They deserve to be happier than they are in that marriage that is just holding them back from that happiness. What's wrong with divorcing if it'll just make both parties happier? What's wrong with divorce. Period... or question mark! ?

Sure, divorce is bad for the kids, if there are kids. But so is staying in a relationship you're clearly not satisfied in. These kids grow up thinking it's okay to stay in something that doesn't make them happy. Don't you want your kids to be happy? And sometimes there's more psychological ramifications for the kids if you stay with a partner that isn't good for you. Like, the yelling. The screaming. The beating. Whatever. It's bad for not only you, but the kids. I am positive that my childhood would've been happier, and that I wouldn't have been in a bad place, mentally, for the majority of my life, had my parents divorced or never married in the first place (Sure, I wouldn't be alive, but let's not get into that just yet.). Even if that meant I had to live in a cardboard box because we wouldn't have been able to afford living accommodations without a second income. But my parents stayed together, no matter how much I wished and prayed they wouldn't, because that's just what they were raised to believe.

I think back then, that divorce was so rare because the men were the only ones with power. And they had a lot. They had the power to do almost anything they wanted with little to no retribution. They picked their brides, for the most part. They had affairs. They beat their women. Many could go about acting as if their wife was just a servant and sex slave. Why would they want a divorce?

Unless it's like King Henry VII when he just wanted bride after bride.

Many of these women were stuck in these loveless, degrading, terrible marriages. Or at least marriages they would've been happier not being in. If divorce wasn't so socially unacceptable, if it wasn't so expensive or almost impossible to achieve, the divorce rates then would probably be as high as it is now... except for the fact that these women needed these husbands for the money and privileges and rights, they wouldn't have been able to get otherwise.

Now that women and men are more equal (but not completely equal, yet) in some places, women don't need husbands nearly as much as they used to. And men never needed wives in the first place. Men don't have the power to do what they want without having to face at least some consequences, and women don't either. But also, both genders have the ability to escape emotional and physical abuse. They have the ability to get out of a loveless marriage that is going nowhere. That's just holding them back.

They aren't, as divorcees, as looked down upon as they used to be (although, they still kind of are). It's there. That pearly golden gate disguised as divorce that calls out to many dissatisfied spouses.

COME TO ME!!!

While true that this increase in divorces and this easier accessibility to it probably causes some marriages that could be 'saved' to instead be... well, divorced, the pros outweigh the cons. And just because a marriage is saved doesn't mean the people involved are happier. Nor happier than they would've been as divorcees.

Marriage doesn't guarantee happiness (but neither does divorce).

In my opinion, marriage is a flawed institution, as most things are.


My inspiration came from this article :
http://dailycaller.com/2012/06/12/115-year-old-turtles-divorce-after-36-years-of-marriage/

(P.S. This is referring to the Western society, mostly)

Questioning Religion

Many of my friends, being Christians, asked and wondered about my religion. Especially since I used to be Christian. And when I explained to them, one came up to me in private and shared with me her aggravations and such about Christianity. The parts that frustrated her and made her want to give up religion altogether.

My religion is one of my own. There are parts that are very similar to the Christian fate. Namely, a kind of god. But there are also parts that are very different, such as the bible (in my opinion, it's one of the worst books in the world).

I had grown up going to church every Sunday, as my mother was, and still is, a stalwart Christian. In fact, she's a Sunday teacher, teaching the little kiddies about Jesus and the bible I grew to hate. Because of this, I had accepted Christianity into my life without question. And in my opinion, this isn't the way religion should become part of someone's life. Religion should be something one chooses on their own. Anyways, this became a problem. My mother didn't necessarily suffocate me with Christianity, but ever since I was a kid who would rather spend her days playing kickball or catching bees out on a clear Sunday afternoon than hearing lectures about some God I was supposed to believe in, I rebelled against going to church. But my mother was adamant about it. Maybe this contributed to my dislike of Christianity.

My confusion and frustration with Christianity first came when I was still in my child years, when I was a steadfast animal rights activist. I hated the parts in the bible where they gave humans the rights to the rights of animals. It angered me to no end. Then came the immoralities committed by the heroes in the bible. And when I questioned some of the things that the church deemed immoral, I came up with the conclusion that no, these things aren't immoral. In fact, in many ways, the church members acted very immoral.

Christianity, along with many other religions, isn't flexible. There are many types, but it rarely changes. It's old, not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's like when scientists believed that everything revolved around the earth, back then. It was like an old, racist (wo)man that turned away from any talk of America's new black president. Or an egotistical doctor that staunchly refused to believe his/her diagnosis was wrong. It refused to change.

And the bible. God, the bible. It was so contradicting and hypocritical, it left me pulling my hair out. It left too much room for interpretation, which isn't usually a bad thing, unless it was declared the 'word of God' and therefore, gave people the right to do things that just shouldn't be done. And the God described in the bible, the holy men described in the bible, and all the things they did... God. I did not want to be a part of that.

In the end, my declaration of atheism came with my anger at the oppression of women within the Christian community, and within the bible. It was the last straw that turned me away from any religion. Even in this modern society, Christianity, and many other religions, does entail a certain inequality among the genders. Sometimes, it's very obvious, but other times it's very subtle. And that, as an Equal Opportunist, was not something I could deal with.

But ultimately, my denouncement of Christianity came from an accumulations of wrongs.

I did not want to worship, nor did I believe in, a god that created this world to be so unfair. To give one creature an innate superiority over another. Maybe one had an advantage physically, but surely not to the point where they were given the right to control another. Upon noticing these factors to most religions, I declared that I was atheist. I would not be a part of a religion that I did not wholly believe in. But yet, I prayed every single night. Every. Single. Night.

Maybe it was habit, maybe it was my inner mind telling the rest of me that my mom had succeeded in turning me religious, if only just. Eventually, I came to terms with my inner mind and declared myself with a god. My god loves and accepts everyone for what they are. My god cannot, and does not want to, control us or the world around us. (S)He generally loves and cares for all that is created. Sure, (s)he gets disappointed in us sometimes, but (s)he will never stop rooting for us.

But ultimately, my god does not give a shit. (S)He has better things to do.

My religion has no names. It needs no followers. And it's constantly changing, day by day. It has morals that I try to adhere to.

There is no heaven and hell. So when I die... I'll just cease to exist.

But maybe, just maybe, someone out there got it all right.

And I'll end up in hell.

Oh well.

(P.S. I didn't mean for this to be about bashing Christianity. If anything, it's bashing all religions. But really, it's about me explaining why I turned away from traditional religion. But yes, I don't mind bashing religions. In fact, I think religions (NOT THE PEOPLE!!!) need a good bashing.)

Another Reason I Don't Want to be Pregnant

Hey guys! You probably don't know but I NEVER want to be pregnant. Never have, never will.
I'll list some reasons later, but here's a new one that I just discovered.
When pregnant, I get LESS rights than the already lousy rights I have now.
Here's the link >> http://www.thefrisky.com/2012-05-01/the-soapbox-in-america-we-treat-our-moms-like-second-class-citizens/

It's not that I ever decide to do drugs because personally, I never plan on doing so. I'm a hedonist, so I know that if I like it, I'll never stop. Anyways, what if I get slipped drugs or something and I never find out till the baby gets tested and comes out positive. Or something like that. Or I didn't know I was pregnant and had some pills or something. Seriously? This law is unfair. Already pregnant women have to go through with... well, PREGNANCY! And LABOR! It's so scary. So crappy. And now, we're getting less rights than we do now?

Yeah, I get it. The whole protecting potential little buggers. But my body IS MINE! Even while I have a fetus growing inside me. I'd like to be able to do what I like. Keep my choices (I'm VERY pro-choice). If I love this fetus, most likely I'd keep the fetus and not endanger said fetus.

GAH! I can't continue.

(not edited yet)

Reasons for Birth Control
1. Hormonal problems like severe cramps, bleeding, mood swings, etc that are both really annoying and prevent women from performing in daily activities.
2. Prevent unwanted pregnancies=less abortion
3. Help women GET pregnant (believe it or not)
4. Other reasons that I will fill in when I have more time.

People who Use Birth Control
1. Paranoid (for good reason) people who don't want to get pregnant from possible rape.
2. Women with one too many children or who do not want children. Ever.
3. Women not ready for children.
4.  many other people...
The thing is, birth control does not mean one is promiscuous. Many women saving themselves for marriage use it for various reasons. Many girls and women who aren't planning on engaging in sex anytime soon use it. And many women who are promiscuous or have sex in loving, exclusive relationships use it, too. And what is wrong with being promiscuous?

And did anyone notice how almost everyone who bashes contraceptives don't say anything about condoms?
Why? It's guy-oriented.

And many people who are in loving, exclusive relationships (like marriage) use contraceptives (like birth control) because they don't want children right now or ever (whatever their reasons may be). And why should they be involved in insurances? They may not be able to afford it. By keeping these things on insurance plans, it's not promoting promiscuity. It's promoting safe sex and the choice to have a child when one wants one. It can be interpreted as America saying, look. Abortions happen. It's just a fact. Even if we abolish it, it's going to happen illegally. So here's our step into trying to prevent abortions.

Go Birth Control.

-will be edited eventually-

Banning PRIVATE Insurance Companies from Providing Insurance in Abortions?

Abortions. Not just for sluts.
For mothers and wives with one too many children.
For women who do not WANT children. Period.
For women and girls that have been raped/date raped/whatever.
For women who just aren't ready for motherhood right now.
For fetuses with health problems.
For women who could die from child birth.
And a BUNCH of other reasons.
It's a second chance for the (not traditional) American dream. An opportunity.
A choice.

Pro-Choice.

Anyways, I don't think the government should have a say on PRIVATE insurance companies. PRIVATE. And abortion should be affordable for all.

More on abortion later. I'm too busy/lazy/hot right now.

Originality is So Last Century

Well, I'm upset. I've thought of a bunch of different, and what I think cool and original, names for this blog but nada. They're all taken. Every single one of them. And I had like 50 ideas. This is really frustrating. I think the world just as one billion too many people in it. If you think you have an original idea, think again! It's out there somewhere, trust me.