I Feel so Pretty... Oh-so Pretty~

The song What Make You Beautiful by One Direction embodies a societal ideal which I find grossly disturbing. I know the singers probably don’t exactly 100% mean it when they say that it’s the fact that this anonymous girl (that I’m sure a bunch of you wish you were) doesn’t know she’s beautiful (and I’ll go as far as to say that this girl has serious self-esteem issues, which is okay and normal, too) is the main reason they like her (and probably also the fact that she is beautiful despite what she thinks). And that’s okay to be into that sort of thing. To each their own and all that shit.

Let’s get this straight: I could give a fuck what songs are about (mostly they’re about fucking these days, which is nice, too) and this song doesn’t particularly bother me.

Ay! Sexy layday~

But what gets to me is, the fact that girls who know they’re beautiful? They’re bitches. They’re conceited and vain and all this shit. And I admit it, I used to think this too (in middle school).
But seriously people? In this society, it is ideal for a beautiful woman to be meek and humble about her appearance. And I get it. Humble is awesome (annoying sometimes, but awesome). But to the point of being shy and awkward and unhappy because one thinks something that is untrue is true? There's something wrong with that being what society wants from our young and beautiful girls and women. When one is truly beautiful, is it really a shock or a bad thing if she knows she is?

I’ve offended a couple of people (including my own sister!) by jokingly declaring things like “You wish you were as hot as this” or singing that song that I had thought went “I am so pretty/ Oh so pretty ♪” And all this is jokingly and during a time when I thought I was beyond ugly. Yes, it offends people. Maybe because I am kind of pretty (or maybe because I’m not?) (As you can see, I still have self-esteem issues).

I know I’m not beautiful. I know I’m not going to win a beauty contest or wet t-shirt contest anytime soon. But I know that I’m not ugly. I know that there are many guys out there that would find me attractive (and many that would not), and that there are (a few) girls out there that are jealous of my looks. And I know, I know. That sounds (without the parentheticals) super conceited. I read it now and I’m like, who is this bitch?
 
But logically. I’d have to be an unobservant idiot or just someone with low(er) self-esteem (than I have now) to not know that I’m not ugly.

And let me tell you, being in a constant state of self-consciousness is a fucking annoying state to be in. It’s not a bad thing (morally) but it is a bitch to not feel good about yourself.

So. It’s okay. To Feel. To Know. To Think. That You are Beautiful.

A Story on Immigration

As a Korean American living in the United States, I come into contact with a lot of Korean immigrants. Some came recently or at their late teen years, while others came much earlier, like at the peak of their childhood, and sometimes much earlier than that. One of my friends came here about a decade earlier with her older sisters.

Her eldest sister had been contributing to this society for years. She went to school, got good grades, worked and spent money, and was striving for the American dream just like the rest of us. Even after she was uprooted from all she had ever known and was forced to integrate into a society she had been thrust into without a choice. But she did what she could to support her family and become a productive member of the United States.

Four years she spent learning a trade and contributing beneficially to the university she went to. Four long, hard years after many earlier long, hard years. But then, when she graduated, she learned she couldn't get her degree because she wasn't a citizen of the United States.

Then recently, when she learned that, since she was younger than 30, thanks to a new law or whatever (I don't know the details), she could now become a CITIZEN OF THE UNITED STATES, she cried with joy.

-to be edited-

Divorce Ain't So Bad

It's common knowledge that divorce rates are increasing all over the world. And most people are alarmed by this. I usually just brush it off. Sometimes, I even rejoice a little.

Divorce isn't a bad thing, in my opinion. But that may just be because I've always harbored a desire for my own parents to divorce. Divorce is a way to get out of a bad thing. It's a way for one to be happier in one's life. It's the breaking of a union between two people, like... endothermic chemical reactions (I have chemistry regents on the brain. My bad.)! Energy must be put into this process and then, the bond breaks. Look, there is nothing wrong with endothermic reactions, and there is nothing wrong with divorce.

I rejoice in the fact that marriages aren't 100% permanent. If divorce ever becomes illegal, I'm never marrying. That's not to say that I want a divorce. If I get married, it'll be to a person and for a life that I know I'll never want to leave. But it's nice to know that if things get rough, I have an escape plan. And I know, that sounds lazy, and kind of wrong. But what I'm talking about by when things get rough isn't if we get into an argument. It isn't if we're short on money and struggling. It's if he becomes an abuser. Or breaks my trust to a point of no return. Or if we both simply fall out of love with no hope of ever falling back.

The divorce rate is higher, not only because people are marrying for the wrong reasons or because they are intoxicated by lust rather than love, but also because now that it's more widely acceptable and accessible, people who hadn't gotten divorces because of religious beliefs or societal restrictions, money problems or etc, are getting it. People who were abused see a way to get out. People who no longer love each other, who have been betrayed and can't see getting their trust back. People who want out.

They deserve happiness. They deserve to be happier than they are in that marriage that is just holding them back from that happiness. What's wrong with divorcing if it'll just make both parties happier? What's wrong with divorce. Period... or question mark! ?

Sure, divorce is bad for the kids, if there are kids. But so is staying in a relationship you're clearly not satisfied in. These kids grow up thinking it's okay to stay in something that doesn't make them happy. Don't you want your kids to be happy? And sometimes there's more psychological ramifications for the kids if you stay with a partner that isn't good for you. Like, the yelling. The screaming. The beating. Whatever. It's bad for not only you, but the kids. I am positive that my childhood would've been happier, and that I wouldn't have been in a bad place, mentally, for the majority of my life, had my parents divorced or never married in the first place (Sure, I wouldn't be alive, but let's not get into that just yet.). Even if that meant I had to live in a cardboard box because we wouldn't have been able to afford living accommodations without a second income. But my parents stayed together, no matter how much I wished and prayed they wouldn't, because that's just what they were raised to believe.

I think back then, that divorce was so rare because the men were the only ones with power. And they had a lot. They had the power to do almost anything they wanted with little to no retribution. They picked their brides, for the most part. They had affairs. They beat their women. Many could go about acting as if their wife was just a servant and sex slave. Why would they want a divorce?

Unless it's like King Henry VII when he just wanted bride after bride.

Many of these women were stuck in these loveless, degrading, terrible marriages. Or at least marriages they would've been happier not being in. If divorce wasn't so socially unacceptable, if it wasn't so expensive or almost impossible to achieve, the divorce rates then would probably be as high as it is now... except for the fact that these women needed these husbands for the money and privileges and rights, they wouldn't have been able to get otherwise.

Now that women and men are more equal (but not completely equal, yet) in some places, women don't need husbands nearly as much as they used to. And men never needed wives in the first place. Men don't have the power to do what they want without having to face at least some consequences, and women don't either. But also, both genders have the ability to escape emotional and physical abuse. They have the ability to get out of a loveless marriage that is going nowhere. That's just holding them back.

They aren't, as divorcees, as looked down upon as they used to be (although, they still kind of are). It's there. That pearly golden gate disguised as divorce that calls out to many dissatisfied spouses.

COME TO ME!!!

While true that this increase in divorces and this easier accessibility to it probably causes some marriages that could be 'saved' to instead be... well, divorced, the pros outweigh the cons. And just because a marriage is saved doesn't mean the people involved are happier. Nor happier than they would've been as divorcees.

Marriage doesn't guarantee happiness (but neither does divorce).

In my opinion, marriage is a flawed institution, as most things are.


My inspiration came from this article :
http://dailycaller.com/2012/06/12/115-year-old-turtles-divorce-after-36-years-of-marriage/

(P.S. This is referring to the Western society, mostly)

What Makes Me a Woman

My vagina.

Not my love of shoes. Not my caring nature. Not the roundness of my boobs or the slimness of my waist. Not the weakness of my muscles nor the intelligence, or lack thereof, in my brain. Not my tendency to cringe at certain levels of grossness, nor the amount of times I cry. It's not my preference of men that makes me a female.

I'm no less of a female because I don't want children. I'm no less of a female if I was really good at sports. If I could win an arm wrestle with a man, it doesn't mean I'm not a woman (and he's no less of a man if he had lost). And just because I'm comfortable farting in public does not make me any less of a woman (although I don't because I have to be sensible to other people's... sensibilities).

There's no certain rules or requirements to be a certain gender, other than one we can't really control. Whether we have the proper sexual organs. Sometimes we have both, which makes us both genders. And maybe there's someone out there with neither, which probably makes them none of those.

I'm a female because I have a vagina.

And what makes a male a male?

His dick.

Not because he is strong. Nor because he 'can't' control his sex drive. He's not male because he has abs. Nor is his intelligence or stoicism the reason he is male.

He is male because he has a dick.

My inspiration came from this article :
http://feministing.com/2012/06/14/the-olympic-games-are-obsessed-with-policing-femininity/

No Abortions for Military Rape Victims

Let's all agree that abortion for raped women should be accessible and affordable to all. Even my highly conservative and religious friends, and even my mother!, agree on this. But, you're entitled to your own opinion...

Anyways, guess what. Not only is it not affordable for many raped women, it is extremely hard to get for women serving in the military. It is very costly, not covered by their health insurance, and can be extremely dangerous, especially if they're stationed in places like Afghanistan where health care isn't very advanced. And some places, abortion is inaccessible because it's illegal or highly, more highly than here, discouraged there. These are military women. Soldiers. And it's estimated that hundreds, and probably more, get raped every year by fellow soldiers.

Even if this article isn't exactly about the rape of soldiers by soldiers, let me address that these 'heroes', these men that are 'serving' our country and who we look up to are raping their fellow soldiers who are risking their lives to serve our country. War, fighting, death is bad enough, but then we throw in the trauma of rape and the inability to feel safe among their fellow workers. How horrible is that situation? Okay. I'm done.

I think abortion should be accessible for everyone. And it somewhat is, in the United States. Sure, us women have to face discrimination, and a lot of times, it costs too much. And we also have to take into account that some doctors LIE to us to prevent us from getting abortions, but at least it's accessible... kind of.

Why shouldn't it be as accessible, if not more, to the women who are 'serving' the country. They are serving the government for as little as $18,000 a year. They deserve, if not from us then from at least the government who they are serving, as many rights as the people who live in the United States. The government should pay for abortion, whatever the reason, including if the woman was raped. They should give it to these women without question.

And let's not even get into how hard it is to be pregnant and a mother in the military.

There's this story mentioned in the article about a young woman who was stationed in Korea. She was raped and unable to get an abortion. Eventually she was fired, even though she was going to be a career soldier, and had a miscarriage. No women, no person, should have to face that.

The Republican Senators are stopping the accessibility of abortion to women who were raped from happening.

Sources :
Article - http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2012/06/shaheen-amendment-military-rape-abortio

My Apologies to Miley Cyrus

I am sorry, Miley Cyrus, even if I know you probably don't give a shit.

I am sorry that I had judged you as everyone else had, although admittedly not nearly as much as my peers. I am sorry I thought you were a bit of a whore and an attention-seeker. And maybe you are. Maybe not. But there's nothing wrong with that.

You're right. It's who you are. And as a liberal and equal opportunist, I'm ashamed to say that I had let society sway my views. Although I had first felt a bit of disdain for you while I was still in my conservative-ish/easily influenced youth, my opinion of you had still not changed much as I grew. Partially because I never really thought of you. But, I'm sorry, for all it's worth.

Miley Cyrus, I commend you for being open about what you believe, despite how others tried to mold you into. For being the person you are, even if no one seems to like it. For becoming the person you want to be, rather than the one everyone else wants you to be.

I wish you the best in your endeavors, including your recent engagement, even if I discourage it. But as many things in the world, just because someone discourages something doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. So for your sake, and your fiance's, I hope that, even if it doesn't last or even if it does, it's not a mistake.

But... I'm still not a fan of your music... Awesome voice though!

I Want a Wife

Let me just start out by saying, I am straight. Yup. Straight. Sure, there are times when I appreciate the beauty of a woman's body. Her silhouette. The curves and straights of it all. The way it works. I have an artistic mind and I have been caught staring at women's butts as I fantasized about the best way to sketch them out on paper. Women have such lovely bodies.

But as a straight woman, I have no desire to kiss the soft, plush lips of another woman, or feel her slender, delicate fingers skid across my clitoris. And I know it sounds like I do, but just writing that has slightly grossed me out. It would've grossed me out more, as I am straight, but I'm not as affected by things as I used to be.

So anyways, if I had to have a spouse, I'd want a wife. Not one of them wage-earning, modern feminist types either, but the meek, traditional one. Yup. I do not want a husband who would expect from me a smidgen of what I would expect from my wife. I'd like a wife and maybe a beau on the side as well, and she can have one too, because I do want some cock in my life.

But generally, I want that traditional wife who'll serve me up some yum yum when I get home from work. I want that wife who'll clean the house and do the laundry. Who, if we had children (which I'd maybe, maybe consider if I didn't do the birthing or the majority of the taking care of), would be the one to get them ready for school and watch over them, wipe their asses and generally take care of them.

Yup. That's what I'd want if I had to choose.

(Ehh... here's me kind of apologizing/explaining myself again. As an equal opportunist, I don't find anything wrong with wanting to be, and then becoming, the traditional wife. I just don't want to be one. But if you did, good luck. I wish you the best.)

Republican Wants to Hurl Acid On Democratic Women

This is so disturbing.

So the basic gist of this is that a Republican spokesman or official or whatever thought it'd be funny to say that they should hurl (not just throw, but hurl) acid on Democratic women for supporting an act that is supposed to give women the opportunity to get equal pay as their male counterparts. Let me just say that whether or not he said it in a joke, it is not funny to throw acid on anyone. I'd be the first one to laugh at insensitive, racist, or sexist jokes if they were truly funny and meant as jokes. But this. Just... wow.

Even before I knew that throwing acid on women for acting out against social norms/traditions/ or even to dare refuse a man's proposal was common, it was not funny. And now knowing this, it's still not funny. In fact, it's horrifying.

Do we really want people who think like this governing our country? People who would disregard the cruelty of others by tossing it off as a cruel joke? Would we want our sisters, mothers, daughters, nieces, cousins, etc to have to face this disdain and disrespect?

For daring to stand up for something they believed in, a Republican spokesman made a joke to hurl acid on Democratic women. (And they say they're not waging a war on women. Pssh.)

While true that the Democrats, even though they support the equal pay for equal work act, don't implement this ideal in their own salaries, it does not mean that the women should be thrown acid at. If this act was to be passed, I think the women in the Democratic party would get equal pay, too. And the study that showed that there was a pay gap when it came to gender did not include things like location of work, experience, etc. Which is important, because, let's face it. Men have been working in politics for longer than women. And one of the most important factors in determining one's wage is experience.

And even if they're not supporting this act within their own group, at least they're supporting it for people like you and me, while the Republicans don't support it at all.

So before you vote, think, who's best for me and the ones I care for?

Sources :
Article - http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2012/05/31/congresswomans-spokesman-hurl-some-acid-at-female-democratic-senators/
Acid Throwing - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acid_throwing
Study - http://nation.foxnews.com/senate-dems/2012/06/01/democratic-senators-don-t-believe-equal-pay-women

I hate being part of a statistic or generalization based on race or gender but I can admit when I am part of one. And... wow.
This site is, in my opinion as a first generation Asian-American, pretty accurate. They do have some things wrong, in my experience... but I find myself agreeing to a lot of it as well.

Sexual Assault Among Soldiers

I feel like an idiot. I always thought I was rather cynical in regards to the general badness of all humans regardless of career, race, gender, etc. I always thought I was a bit paranoid and suspicious. And I am. I've wondered before on the prominence of sexual harassment in the military and army. And even I, someone who does not believe that all soldiers are heroes (more on this later), dismissed this thought.

Society has brainwashed me into believing the heroism and moral goodness of soldiers, people who have been proven to literally sell women into pretty much prostitution. Who cover up their own crimes and so on. How could I dismiss the thought that sexual assault would be so prominent in a career where men outnumbered and usually were in higher positions than women who were usually miles and miles away from their home?

from Unbreakable Project

Yes. That's right. There is sexual assault against women (and probably men, too) in the military. And not the military of a country where women are being oppressed either, but here in the United States. The military, army, marines, etc that we are so proud of. And not only when soldiers are stationed in other countries, either. Sexual assault by soldiers against their fellow lady soldiers is happening here. On home ground. And it hasn't been so much as acknowledged by the general public, or even the government. Until now... kind of.

I have never been so disappointed in the Democrats. (But remember, the Republicans haven't been good about this either.)

Sources :
Article - http://www.wnyc.org/articles/wnyc-news/2012/may/29/vets-complain-harassment-leads-sexual-assaults-military/

Beware of What You Wear?

I'm pretty sure I've covered this before, but I'm going to say it again. Stop with the victim blaming! Rape is not caused by the short skirt and tight tank. It's not caused by the double shot of tequila, nor by the bedroom eyes cast around the room. It is caused by... dun dun DUN~ Rapists!

By blaming (and/shaming) the teenage, or middle-aged, or whatever aged women for being raped, simply because she was dressed a bit provocatively, or because she's just naturally sexy, is not right. That's like blaming the man wearing the tight v-neck tee (or not wearing a shirt at all) and sexy Levis for being butt raped, or raped by a woman (it happens). But guess what! No one ever blames the guy (and they shouldn't). Why? Because the guy in the provocative and sexy clothing is well, a guy!

By not blaming the guy for getting rape is the right way of thinking! We should transfer that way of thinking onto women victims, too. Why? Because that's the way we should be thinking! It's not only women who can seduce their partners. Men can and do, too. So by insisting that the female victim of the rape is somehow in the blame, for being sexy, it can be said that men are, too. Because men can be mouthwateringly delicious as well.

fuck me... please

But are they in the blame? No. And they shouldn't be. But neither should women.

Do you see my logic?

And rape isn't always about one's physical attraction to another. It can also, and usually is, a mind thing. It can be a need, or desire, to dominate another by sexual and abusive means. Many heterosexual, male serial killers raped their man victims to feel powerful. Not because of their repressed attraction towards males.

And by blaming and shaming the women for the rape makes women less willing to bring this injustice to the officials. And rapists get a jail free card. It is also alleviating some of the blame from the true suspects. The rapists. They get off some time. Sometimes they get off completely. Do we really want a society that's rampant in morally disturbed rapists that in the eyes of the law, aren't rapists?

I'd like to know that if I felt like getting sexy and all dressed up, I could. Without fear of attracting the attentions of a rapist. I shouldn't have to worry that if I get slightly tipsy, if not completely plastered, I'll be tricked into a shady alley to get fucked by a man who got off jail time and is now more brazen and confident about not getting convicted. And it'd be absolutely great to know that if I did so happened to be raped, I could get the justice I deserve, even if I may have been dressed a bit 'slutty' and regardless of if I am or am not a 'slut'.

It'd be a wonderful world, I think, if I didn't have to worry about any of that.

If only.

(P.S. In no way am I saying that male victims of rape are any less victims of rape than women. And the above quote underneath the picture of the HOT guy, I'm asking him, too. Yeah.)

ESSURE

*NOTE: Please read to the bottom.

ESSURE
ESSURE
ESSURE
ESSURE

I want it now! Thank you Planned Parenthood for introducing me to this option through your website! It was hard to find, but VERY worth it. I'm so lucky to have found it, because people don't usually teach or tell anyone about these options, though everyone should know what their options are, and now I'll show it to you.

ESSURE

Permanent birth control! No incision! Office procedure!

ESSURE~

IMPORTANT EDIT:
For the second time, I must apologize for posting before more extensive research. After much scouring the web and such, I've read some awful horror stories on Essure and Adiana (and many success stories).

Most of these horror tales consist of a few more days of recovery needed than the website had promised, but some included unplanned pregnancies (Adiana), and migration of the copper coil (Essure). Other stories were a little worse, including abdominal pain and so on. Once, I read about painful sex, but the women had had another uteral or vaginal procedure done so Essure may have not been the reason, but then again, it might have.

So let this be a lesson to all, and me, do extensive research before jumping on board. All it takes is a few clicks on Google, and ta da! There it is.

Either way, I'm still considering both these options, because sometimes, the risk is worth it.

Questioning Religion

Many of my friends, being Christians, asked and wondered about my religion. Especially since I used to be Christian. And when I explained to them, one came up to me in private and shared with me her aggravations and such about Christianity. The parts that frustrated her and made her want to give up religion altogether.

My religion is one of my own. There are parts that are very similar to the Christian fate. Namely, a kind of god. But there are also parts that are very different, such as the bible (in my opinion, it's one of the worst books in the world).

I had grown up going to church every Sunday, as my mother was, and still is, a stalwart Christian. In fact, she's a Sunday teacher, teaching the little kiddies about Jesus and the bible I grew to hate. Because of this, I had accepted Christianity into my life without question. And in my opinion, this isn't the way religion should become part of someone's life. Religion should be something one chooses on their own. Anyways, this became a problem. My mother didn't necessarily suffocate me with Christianity, but ever since I was a kid who would rather spend her days playing kickball or catching bees out on a clear Sunday afternoon than hearing lectures about some God I was supposed to believe in, I rebelled against going to church. But my mother was adamant about it. Maybe this contributed to my dislike of Christianity.

My confusion and frustration with Christianity first came when I was still in my child years, when I was a steadfast animal rights activist. I hated the parts in the bible where they gave humans the rights to the rights of animals. It angered me to no end. Then came the immoralities committed by the heroes in the bible. And when I questioned some of the things that the church deemed immoral, I came up with the conclusion that no, these things aren't immoral. In fact, in many ways, the church members acted very immoral.

Christianity, along with many other religions, isn't flexible. There are many types, but it rarely changes. It's old, not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's like when scientists believed that everything revolved around the earth, back then. It was like an old, racist (wo)man that turned away from any talk of America's new black president. Or an egotistical doctor that staunchly refused to believe his/her diagnosis was wrong. It refused to change.

And the bible. God, the bible. It was so contradicting and hypocritical, it left me pulling my hair out. It left too much room for interpretation, which isn't usually a bad thing, unless it was declared the 'word of God' and therefore, gave people the right to do things that just shouldn't be done. And the God described in the bible, the holy men described in the bible, and all the things they did... God. I did not want to be a part of that.

In the end, my declaration of atheism came with my anger at the oppression of women within the Christian community, and within the bible. It was the last straw that turned me away from any religion. Even in this modern society, Christianity, and many other religions, does entail a certain inequality among the genders. Sometimes, it's very obvious, but other times it's very subtle. And that, as an Equal Opportunist, was not something I could deal with.

But ultimately, my denouncement of Christianity came from an accumulations of wrongs.

I did not want to worship, nor did I believe in, a god that created this world to be so unfair. To give one creature an innate superiority over another. Maybe one had an advantage physically, but surely not to the point where they were given the right to control another. Upon noticing these factors to most religions, I declared that I was atheist. I would not be a part of a religion that I did not wholly believe in. But yet, I prayed every single night. Every. Single. Night.

Maybe it was habit, maybe it was my inner mind telling the rest of me that my mom had succeeded in turning me religious, if only just. Eventually, I came to terms with my inner mind and declared myself with a god. My god loves and accepts everyone for what they are. My god cannot, and does not want to, control us or the world around us. (S)He generally loves and cares for all that is created. Sure, (s)he gets disappointed in us sometimes, but (s)he will never stop rooting for us.

But ultimately, my god does not give a shit. (S)He has better things to do.

My religion has no names. It needs no followers. And it's constantly changing, day by day. It has morals that I try to adhere to.

There is no heaven and hell. So when I die... I'll just cease to exist.

But maybe, just maybe, someone out there got it all right.

And I'll end up in hell.

Oh well.

(P.S. I didn't mean for this to be about bashing Christianity. If anything, it's bashing all religions. But really, it's about me explaining why I turned away from traditional religion. But yes, I don't mind bashing religions. In fact, I think religions (NOT THE PEOPLE!!!) need a good bashing.)

I'm An Equal Opportunist

When I tell people this, they usually go, "What's that?"

It's a phrase that I like to think I coined myself, but I'm sure there's others out there who identify themselves as equal opportunists. Actually, I recently learned that equal opportunist has something to do with sex. Bisexual?

But that's not what I mean when I say equal opportunist (I'm straight, though there's nothing wrong with being curved). Equal opportunist is when one believes that everyone (regardless of race, class, gender, religion, sexual orientation, etc) should have equal opportunities. They should all have the same chance to go to a top notch school. They should all have the same opportunity to strive for what they want to accomplish. They should all have the right to choose what they want to do as their job, how to raise their children (if they want kids), how to live.

Of course, if they want to be a lawyer, they'd have to actually work for it. They'd have to study and try hard. If they had slacked their whole lives and applied for the same job as someone who graduated from... Harvard with straight As then they probably shouldn't get the job. But that one from Harvard shouldn't have a greater chance than the one who was also from Harvard with similar, if not better, grades, just because that one is black, or a woman, or from the slums of Detroit. That shouldn't matter.

Equal opportunist isn't only about the gender of someone, but it's the best example I can think of.

Women (and men) should be able to choose what she (he) wants to do. Most feminists feel disdain and/or for the traditional homebody housewife who takes care of the kids and cleans the house while her doctor husband brings home the bacon. But if that's what she (or he) wants, as an equal opportunist, I say, go for it! Just as I'd say go for it to a woman (or man) who does not want a single child and wants to become President of the United States. Now, if that first woman did not want to be the housewife with the 2.5 kids and white picket fence, and instead had wanted to be the President, I'd pity her. Especially if she had grown up in a sexist environment where she was strongly discouraged to reach for her dreams. I'd feel as if she was wronged. And as a fellow woman, I'd feel wronged.

As an equal opportunist, I may not want the same things that you'd want, but I'd defend your right to want it. (Unless it's against my morals)

Another Reason I Don't Want to be Pregnant

Hey guys! You probably don't know but I NEVER want to be pregnant. Never have, never will.
I'll list some reasons later, but here's a new one that I just discovered.
When pregnant, I get LESS rights than the already lousy rights I have now.
Here's the link >> http://www.thefrisky.com/2012-05-01/the-soapbox-in-america-we-treat-our-moms-like-second-class-citizens/

It's not that I ever decide to do drugs because personally, I never plan on doing so. I'm a hedonist, so I know that if I like it, I'll never stop. Anyways, what if I get slipped drugs or something and I never find out till the baby gets tested and comes out positive. Or something like that. Or I didn't know I was pregnant and had some pills or something. Seriously? This law is unfair. Already pregnant women have to go through with... well, PREGNANCY! And LABOR! It's so scary. So crappy. And now, we're getting less rights than we do now?

Yeah, I get it. The whole protecting potential little buggers. But my body IS MINE! Even while I have a fetus growing inside me. I'd like to be able to do what I like. Keep my choices (I'm VERY pro-choice). If I love this fetus, most likely I'd keep the fetus and not endanger said fetus.

GAH! I can't continue.

(not edited yet)

Reasons for Birth Control
1. Hormonal problems like severe cramps, bleeding, mood swings, etc that are both really annoying and prevent women from performing in daily activities.
2. Prevent unwanted pregnancies=less abortion
3. Help women GET pregnant (believe it or not)
4. Other reasons that I will fill in when I have more time.

People who Use Birth Control
1. Paranoid (for good reason) people who don't want to get pregnant from possible rape.
2. Women with one too many children or who do not want children. Ever.
3. Women not ready for children.
4.  many other people...
The thing is, birth control does not mean one is promiscuous. Many women saving themselves for marriage use it for various reasons. Many girls and women who aren't planning on engaging in sex anytime soon use it. And many women who are promiscuous or have sex in loving, exclusive relationships use it, too. And what is wrong with being promiscuous?

And did anyone notice how almost everyone who bashes contraceptives don't say anything about condoms?
Why? It's guy-oriented.

And many people who are in loving, exclusive relationships (like marriage) use contraceptives (like birth control) because they don't want children right now or ever (whatever their reasons may be). And why should they be involved in insurances? They may not be able to afford it. By keeping these things on insurance plans, it's not promoting promiscuity. It's promoting safe sex and the choice to have a child when one wants one. It can be interpreted as America saying, look. Abortions happen. It's just a fact. Even if we abolish it, it's going to happen illegally. So here's our step into trying to prevent abortions.

Go Birth Control.

-will be edited eventually-

Banning PRIVATE Insurance Companies from Providing Insurance in Abortions?

Abortions. Not just for sluts.
For mothers and wives with one too many children.
For women who do not WANT children. Period.
For women and girls that have been raped/date raped/whatever.
For women who just aren't ready for motherhood right now.
For fetuses with health problems.
For women who could die from child birth.
And a BUNCH of other reasons.
It's a second chance for the (not traditional) American dream. An opportunity.
A choice.

Pro-Choice.

Anyways, I don't think the government should have a say on PRIVATE insurance companies. PRIVATE. And abortion should be affordable for all.

More on abortion later. I'm too busy/lazy/hot right now.

The Surest Way to Stop Rape

Cut off men's penises and sew up people's buttholes and vaginas.

Not to be crude, but I'm pretty sure that's the only way to stop rape 90%. But that's probably illegal. The butt hole and cutting off penises thing also solves rapes on men! So... win-win. But this is never going to happen, so let's get real.

Rape is 100% the rapists fault.

Does it matter that I want to look sexy and confident by wearing fuck-me heels and a tight, short dress? Or that, it being a really hot day in a really stuffy club, I chose to wear short shorts and a tank top so I won't die of heat stroke.

It's one thing if I enthusiastically nod my head when a man asks me to have sex with him, drunk or not. It's another if I murmur no or have no idea what's going on when a man is trying to stuff his penis up my vagina. And a completely different thing if a someone drags me into a dark alley and forces his penis up my vagina or butt hole.

By blaming me, for wearing said short, tight dress and fuck-me shoes, you're saying that a rapist is completely justified in grabbing a man wearing a speedo and fucking him up his ass. Or grabbing a teenage boy in tight jeans and a v-neck shirt that shows off his muscular chest and going forth in forcing his penis up his teenage butt hole.

So in no way should the victim be blamed for being raped. At all. Unless your prepared to also blame that teenage boy, because, that v-neck shirt and butt-hugging Levis? They're the male-equivalent to that formfitting stripper dress. Or what if he was running home, all hot and sweaty, shirtless and with basketball shirts on when he was grabbed and dragged into a dark alley.

Was it the victim's fault?

-Will edit later.-

I've Fallen in Love...

With shoes.

I realized at recently that I've been to a domestic violence shelter before. I was sitting in front of my computer and came across a video about a woman's shelter when BAM! It hit me. It was an awful realization. And even though I knew that I had nothing to be ashamed of, admittedly, I felt ashamed. Just a little bit.

I remember vague bits and pieces of it, since I was really young at the time. About four or five? Maybe even a little older. Maybe younger. I don't know exactly what triggered my mom's sudden need to run, since I was so used to the situation we were in and I was too young at the time to realize the gravity of the situation and that, no, it wasn't (or shouldn't be) 'normal'. But I remember that we (the Choi women: my sister, mom, and I) snuck out of the residence during the night like naughty teenagers sneaking out to party. The rest is a blur of random snippets of my time there. I remember learning how to play old navy with a little blonde boy and a young woman. The people there were all very warm and welcoming. Didn't ask questions and just invited us in with open arms and fresh cookies. I remember the place resembled a regular home and I specifically remember a bathroom with a bath. A bath! I'm sure I've had baths before then, but for some reason, I remember this one even now.

It was fun. It was new. It was an adventure.

And one day, a few years later, a friend of my mom's gave us their dog. His name was Pippy, and he was the answer to my prayers (and requests to Santa Claus). He loved to jump into open bags and just stay there with his eyelids at half mast. My sister and I'd take him out to walks and try to teach him how to play catch (and return). We'd take him everywhere and never leave him alone. Never. We absolutely adored him.

So time went on with this new addition to our family. And nothing else changed. There was still that ominous cloud floating above our heads. A question on the minds of my sister and I, 'Will we leave again?' And we did leave a few times. To a motel (I had a blast there, too) and we even slept in the car at a random parking lot (I thought that was like camping. Really fun.). And, thankfully, we usually brought Pippy, even if we had to sneak him in.

Even at a this age, I knew that leaving Pippy behind would be a very bad idea. Very bad. Would he take his anger out on Pippy while we were gone? In what state would we find our dog if we left him? I was afraid for Pippy's life. Afraid. Whenever things got violent, I was scared that we'd leave ol' Pippy behind. When I wasn't home, I worried for his safety. It didn't make it better that Pippy was absolutely petrified of my father. It wasn't like he was a big dog and could defend himself. Because if he was, I would've sicced him on daddy-o.

 

You better run.

I would've been devastated with worry if we had left Pippy home. He was such a comfort to my sister and I, and I even caught my mom, a self-professed animal hater, snuggling him a few times. The point is, if he hadn't been with us, I wouldn't have naively enjoyed the times we were running from home. At first, I hadn't realized that that was what we were doing, running away, although I knew my dad would be mad. But when I caught on, my sister and I sat down with my mom and informed her that if we were to ever leave again, we had to bring Pippy with us. Had to. Maybe that's why we never stayed at a domestic violence shelter again. Since most didn't allow pets.

And now that I think about it, I would never ever stay at a shelter if I couldn't bring my pet with me. I would rather live in an abandoned building and risk rape and illness than leave my pet behind. But even if I did, it would make the traumatizing experience one hundred times worse. Because then I'd be worrying about my pet and feeling guilt. What's happening to him? Is he okay?

So that's why, I think this is so great. I was surfing the web when I came to this site. Rose Brooks Center is a domestic violence shelter that is opening up a pet area so that victims of domestic violence could bring their pets. So that their families wouldn't be split apart. Women and children (and men) who've run away from a bad situation really should not have to be separated from their pets. It's when they need them the most.

So donate, people. Donate.

And hopefully, other shelters will open their doors to the four-legged members of the family.

Kony 2012

I know that probably no one will see this post. Especially not before December, but I'm going to post this anyway. Because this video is so inspirational and it made me cry, which doesn't happen often. It makes me, a self-professed lazy ass, want to jump up and look for that motherf*cker and take him down.

Follow this link to watch it.

But then I, not wanting to mis-educate anyone, did some digging and found out a few things.